bonerfart:

Me: my son is so tiny i must have the tiniest son in the world

Doctor: this is a regular sized baby, i don’t think you understand how babies work

Me: I love my tiny son


hespokeoftoast:

I was not fucking ready

(Source: lolgifs.net)

macintush:

"It’s pronounced like jif"

Yeah well I don’t gif a fuck


itsstuckyinmyhead:

Pets and Tumblr photoset

reblogmyselfie:

I WLLL COME INTO YOUR HOUSE AND FUCKING nap with you

(Source: cumrn)

rrrrosa:

those songs that start in one earbud and flow into the next

image


my friend and i were discussing whether skeletons in the war still go plundering one day. tonight i come home from work to this


llamasouls:

im failing biology

fyeahmainer:

the-arena-ballerina:

neptunain:

christmas is so much worse as you get older it’s like “what do you want this year?” “a sense of purpose”

"a career" "financial security" "a sex life" "tuition for grad school" "alcohol" "a nap" "socks would be nice"

too true.